Wednesday, June 5, 2013

5 years and more in love than ever!

Instead of buying one of those $5 cards that eventually goes in the trash, I decided to make a electronic memory that would last a lot longer.

My sweet husband. When we met over 7 years ago, I would have never thought we would be where we are today. I knew within a few weeks that I wanted to marry you. I'm so blessed and thankful you decided you wanted to put up with me too. I look back and remember the long distance, the weekly letters I looked forward to receiving, the surprise of my life when you actually moved to Florida, and the fairytale moment when you swept me off my feet and asked me to be your bride. I wish our wedding would have lasted forever as it was one of the best days of my life. Now 5 years after we said I Do I am more in love with you than ever before. We have gone through our fair share of troubles, but you have been there by my side through every second of financial, educational, infertility, and every health struggle we have had. We have always said from the moment we met we would put God first in everything we do and that is what has made us come out stronger through it all. I am absolutely honored to have gone through multiple moves and career changes with you. I love that you are a man of God a man of integrity, Sweet, sensitive, compassionate, strong, loyal, and honest. I not only love the husband you are but the father you are to our daughter and daughter on the way. Adaleigh is so lucky to have a daddy that is as hands on and involved as you are. My heart lights up every time I hear you ask her for a kiss or a hug or hear you tell her how beautiful she is or how much you love her. I can not wait to meet our new daughter in August and share the new experiences as a family of 4 together. Thank you for loving me All OF ME the way I am and I can not wait to see what the next 50+ years hold for us.

29 week update!

How Far Along: 29 weeks

Baby's Size: Butternut Squash- ~17 inches (head to foot) just under 3 lbs.
Symptoms: Feeling good!  Braxton hicks contractions on and off. Hot as heck this summer!
Sleep: Still sleeping good except with no covers because I'm always hot now. Waking up a few times to use the bathroom. Rolling around a lot to find a comfortable position.
Total Weight Gain: about 8lbs.
Belly Size: I feel smaller this time although I feel like it has gotten much bigger this week. I have a lot of people still telling me I'm small for 29 weeks although I don't feel small at all.
Maternity Clothes: I'm in shorts and tanks every day almost unless I get lucky and can just wear a bating suit. This mama is hot all the time.
Food Cravings: Sweets Chocolate
Gender: Girl
Movement: Still a lot of movement. She feels transverse or breech although she is swimming a lot still I think. I have a Dr apt on Monday so hopefully we will know more about her position then.  
What I miss: This pregnancy I am chasing my 16 month old around so I don't get to just relax when I want to. Sometimes I wish I could just have one weekend to myself to do nothing!
 What I'm Looking Forward to this Week: Doctor's Appointment.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

One more Trip.

After saying no a few times, not wanting to travel, knowing we have not completed the baby room or really prepared for our new arrival at all. With the encouragement of my husband, I have made one last trip to sunny Florida to see my parents before our 2nd miracle arrives. The plane ride was long, but after stepping onto solid ground we are glad we are here. One more chance to soak up the sun and quality time with my parents. After all that has happened the last few months I do not take one moment for granted. I love watching my parents gush over our baby girl, and know in just a few short months there will be a 4th grand baby to gush over. As she kicks away in my belly I am overcome with joy. I am thankful my husband continues to sacrifice time away from his Girls to give me family time. I know we both needed this break from reality. Although he is not here with me, he too is able to do things without his two needy girls attached to his hip. After all the tears and stress I really just needed my mommy, and I'm so thankful he recognizes that. Robby you truly are amazing and the perfect man for me, you just get me. So if you need me I will be soaking up the rays at the pool or the beach or just trying to enjoy the laughter and playfulness of my 15 month old, before she becomes one of two.

Our God Grants Miracles!

After 2 weeks my husband was home from training, I know that's not a long time in the military world, but with everything we were going through it sure felt like it. I finally had my best friend home and it felt really good, to hear him say "everything is going to be ok babe, we will get through this together." A few days passed and we went as a family to his Below The Zone Senior Airman Promotion Ceremony. I held my breath as we walked through the doors knowing that his "higher up's" wanted to speak with me about our situation. After the ceremony we were quietly pulled into another room to talk. I held back my fear and tears and explained, I didn't know much, but am coming to terms with the possibilities that I would be facing over the next few months. It was at that moment I was thankful my husband had chosen the Air Force over all other branches. They informed us that anything we needed they would help with. They assured me Rob would never struggle to get time off for any appointments or procedures, and that they would back us up and support us in every way possible. Such a relief to know your husband is in a job with caring people like that.

That next Monday was our appointment with the neurologist. (We got it bumped up). We again as a family armed with 3 pages of questions walked into the cold sterile room, ready for whatever was coming our way. I closed my eyes and said one last prayer before the Dr. walked in. I felt a calm and peace in that instant. The neurologist informed me that what they saw on the MRI was in the same location as an Acoustic Neuroma tumor, but was growing in a different direction and had a slightly different look to it. He said he thinks it is not that but actually a Lipoma instead. Another non cancerous tumor,but one they did not need to remove. He said I was most likely born with it and that hopefully it would not cause me any problems. I couldn't help but burst into tears. I felt 1000lbs lifted off my shoulders. I couldn't help but think I could keep my hearing, and I wouldn't have a disfigured face, or balance issues. I was so relieved, as the Dr. looked at me like I was crazy. He then told me my symptoms were from migraines most likely caused by the pregnancy called migraines aura. They cause you to have vision trouble, numbing in arms or face and then horrible migraines up to 72 hrs. He described me to the t. We will not know for sure what kind of tumor I have until Oct 1 when I have another MRI with contrast after the baby is born, but we are believing God has given us our miracle we asked for. Knowing we can not get through this alone. Thank you for your prayers, they truly work and I am proof!

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Rough Night

Tonight is just not a good night. I cant stop crying pity me tears. I feel empty, I feel like no one can understand what I'm going through. I'm angry that I feel like this stuff never ends for me. I just want to enjoy my family. My husband is out of town and I'm stuck in this quiet house while the baby is sleeping with just my thoughts. I get that I'm obsessed with researching, and it doesn't help that there is not much positive info on this stupid tumor, and that I have to wait till the end of May to get any answers at all.But how are you not supposed to think about it? How are you supposed to put it aside and move on with everything else like there is not something major going on in your head? I just found myself falling to my knees praying that God can take this from me. I don't want to think about it I don't want to be "sick" with anything. I want to enjoy this pregnancy and all that comes with it and not think about all the crap that comes with a tumor. I pray that I'm over reacting or that this is all a dream. Tonight I don't want to be a military wife. I don't want to be this far away from family. Its a horrible feeling to look at the clock and realize its midnight and there is no one you feel like you can call and just boo hoo too. I really needed a hug tonight and it makes me miss my husband (my best friend) more than anything tonight. I cant stop the tears they just keep pouring out. My heart hurts, I feel like a horrible mom to my sweet baby girl that has no clue what is going on. She doesn't deserve this empty momma she has right now. I'm praying that I can get some energy in the next few days and stop feeling like a total mess. I don't want to feel this way and I know its not healthy.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Just another bump in the road....

Just when I thought I was in the smooth sailing zone.... Sweet one year old, handsome husband, new baby on the way.... Smack!!! Wake up call Ansley YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL! After a scary day in the hospital with stroke like symptoms I have been told I have a non cancerous Brain Tumor. Your hearing this as early as I am, and are probably as in shock as I am. I had my cry, woe is me pitty day and now its time to tackle this in Summerville fashion. We do not know the next step although it is likely surgery. I feel great at the moment, and have had no further symptoms. I will have an appointment in the next few weeks with a neurologist that will give us more answers. Baby Elliana is fine and perfectly healthy. We are going to just take one day at a time and pray for God to continue to walk us through this path. He has not let us down yet and I have no doubt he will get us through this next bump in the road. If you read this and know me, you know all I ask from you is PRAYER. We know we can not get through this alone and we are not in control of this situation. I hope to be back on here soon to update with good news!

Lets Catch up!

SOOOOOOOOOOOO Its been a while. Let me catch you up with the last few months. Adaleigh is 14 months and a walking, talking ball of fun! We are currently 21 weeks pregnant with our second daughter Elliana that we conceived using ABSOLUTLY NO FERTILITY TREATMENTS!! We could not be more excited to add another sweet baby to our family. I am feeling great and have a good amount of energy still. I try to get outside with Adaleigh everyday and walk or play. Elliana is a breath of fresh air and a constant reminder that GOD IS GOOD every time she kicks! Rob is adjusting to the life of all girls well :) and I can not wait to have our family of four all together.